?

Log in

3 year old and following directions - Good Enough Moms [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Good Enough Moms

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

3 year old and following directions [Sep. 27th, 2005|03:33 pm]
Good Enough Moms

goodenoughmoms

[elfling519]
[mood |draineddrained]

I was wondering if anyone could help me find out how well an average 3 year old is at following simple directions. The 3 year old I watch isn't following the simple directions of put crayon here, (even when I am pointing to the spot). When she is asked to do something, such as help clean up toys, she keeps claiming that she doesn't understand what I am asking her. When you tell her to put something in a box, she doesn't understand "in". She can't draw a reasonaly straight line, and seems to have absolutly no interest in learning new things, such as color names, shapes, numbers and counting. My 18 month old knows shapes and colors better then she does.

And does anyone have any suggestions on how to get her interested again? Help improve her skill at following simple directions? or am i just expecting too much?
linkReply

Comments:
From: paulisdead
2005-09-27 08:55 pm (UTC)

Yikes

I'd have to say that this child is behind for their age in some of the areas you mention but not others.--Assuming they weren't just having an off day, or were pulling your chain.
Unfortunately, for most of these skills, there is a "critical period" whereby once that passes, the child will never have the capacity to learn them as well. The pediatrician should recognize this and recommend an evaluation. How is this child's vocabulary? Do they know a few hundred words at least? Can they say their own name, and age without being given the answer? Certainly a 3 year old should be able to follow instructions and put things in a box when asked.

I happen to think there is little or nothing you can do to help except take the hard step to talk to the parents (which of course is awkward, cause no one wants to hear about how you think their child is slow.) Unless of course you are seeing this child more then they are!

If your 18 month old knows his shapes and colors, that is the other end of remarkable. According to the Learning Disabilities Association of America, the average 3 year old cannot name any colors, and by the time they ar 4 can name one.

Here is a sample "Developmental milestones"
http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/002002.htm

(Reply) (Thread)
From: paulisdead
2005-09-27 08:58 pm (UTC)

and another

this one is much more detailed...I'm sure you can find a bunch on the web yourself too..

http://www.dars.state.tx.us/ecis/resources/developmentmilestones.shtml
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: onecrazymother
2005-09-27 10:11 pm (UTC)

Re: Yikes

and my just-turned-three-yr-old can name several colors, can count to ten, can draw a circle reasonably well... but does not answer, "what's your name?" or "how old are you?" He does say things like "I want the dice." and "Yay! Sandwiches!" and he sings a very pretty "itsy bitsy spider." Looking at whole children rather than checklists is always a good idea.

I think most three year olds follow direction sporadically.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: elfling519
2005-09-27 10:14 pm (UTC)

Re: Yikes

See, and these are the kid of things I need to hear. I don't have a 3 year old, so I have no idea what to look for. To a degree she is very easily distracted, but like any child not if it's something she really likes. Maybe she's just not ready, or used to having to follow directions.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: renegade_geek
2005-09-28 12:01 am (UTC)

Re: Yikes

Looking at whole children rather than checklists is always a good idea.

Here, here! Of course the lists, like any diagnostic, serves the helpful function of allowing those unable to spend lots, and lots of time with the child (i.e. the doctor) identify problems that the parent may not, out of love for the child, ignorance, or whatever.

Really. The average 3 year old can't name any colors? Caitie already has the whole basic 8 crayola box and then some (pink, gray, etc.) In total she definately knows at least 10. Heck she sorts things by color for kicks. She's also been naming shapes for more than half a year. She can count to 15, twenty on a good day.

What kids are these lists based on?

Sorry that was a combination shock and brag post there. Hmmm...
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: elfling519
2005-09-28 01:04 am (UTC)

Re: Yikes

Hey, you can brag about MY niece any day :)
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
From: paulisdead
2005-09-28 01:34 am (UTC)

Re: Yikes

You are right about "lists" for sure. Sometimes it is nice to see what normal is, so that you can see how far your kid is exceeding normal thanks to your extraordinary great parenting :)
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: renegade_geek
2005-09-28 02:06 am (UTC)

Just to be more obnoxious...

I was wrong. I just asked Caitie what her name is and how old she is, and she answered both questions correctly. Guess she just doesn't want to do so for strangers (and wisely, I might add). ;)

We did get into some debate over my age, however. She doesn't really understand the concept of "thirty" or "older" as of yet. Bigger, yes. Older, no.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
From: paulisdead
2005-09-28 12:48 pm (UTC)

heh

Yeah, I just had a 5 year old tell me I was 100, so I figure that's in the ballpark.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: onecrazymother
2005-09-28 01:15 pm (UTC)

Re: Just to be more obnoxious...

I realized that while my little guy doesn't like to answer "what's you name?" He does put on motorcycle boots and do a rap thing, crossing his arms accross his chest and pitching his voice really low: "Hey Mom! I'm [name]! Watcha' Know?!"
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: elfling519
2005-09-27 10:02 pm (UTC)
Well, she can say her name but can't tell you her age. She has a great vocabulary (english and spanish) for "talking" just not putting words with images. The association thing. She knows one color very well, yellow. It's her favorite.

I did find this site (you made me google :)
NNCC.ORG

I'm going to have go through it and see what she may be lacking in. Looking at your lists, I noticed the thing about stick figures. She doesn't really draw any type of coherent shapes, but she does make pictures and tell me what they are of (abstract thinking). I'm just worried that the listening and following directions and not associating words with things is because she may have a hearing problem. Her mother doesn't always take them to the doctors when they are sick (didn't take them when they had strep) so I wonder if she has scarring on her ear drums. And she is ALWAYS complaining that her stomach hurts (sometimes to point of her vommitting, but no other illness symptoms)

Any suggestions on games I could do with her to help her learn to follow directions? and learn other skills? Maybe twister? or simon says?
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: georgiastorms
2005-09-30 02:29 pm (UTC)
I just read this last entry. Is this little girl complaining about her tummy quite often? Does she cry easily? I had a little girl who's father was malesting her and she was always sick to her tummy and sometimes would have a difficult time sitting. I don't want to scare you, just become aware that those things do happen in this messed up world. She also may be autistic in some ways. My niece is borderline and she interacts with people but she looks at us like she speaks another language.

She may have a hearing problem, but mainly it sounds like she is in her own little world. It sounds like her mother needs to get her a physical. You may suggest that you need the kids to have their yearly check-ups before flu/cold season is upon us. Maybe inform her that you would be happy to go with to help?
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: georgiastorms
2005-09-30 02:21 pm (UTC)
I have two children of my own and I had an in home daycare for a few years. I noticed differences between the skill level of my two children and the other children I watched. I work with my children non-stop. I make games out of learning and keep them challenged.

It sounds like this little girl (possibly) doesn't see her parents very much, if they both work. If you are her babysitter every day, I would suggest you sit down with her and make games out of learning. Get on her level and show her how to color and ask her what colors she is using. She just needs someone to sit down and spend some time with her. I worked with a little girl I watched for about 3 months straight, that is all that it took for her to get on the same level as the other kids.
(Reply) (Thread)